The Time I Cried At A Evanescence Show

by - September 08, 2022

Photo courtesy of Dana Gorab

It all started with a 4-year-old girl falling in love with the album Bring Me To Life, or “the CD with the pretty girl’s face on it”.

Even at a young age I was drawn into the soothing voice of Amy Lee, accompanied by these classical and rock aspects perfectly intertwining together to make a movement and/or masterpiece. I had a hard upbringing and really relied on the lyrics of Evanescence who, for me, felt like she was speaking to me. Funny enough, her solo single “Speak To Me” is one of my favorites, especially the live version.

So there is 4-year-old me, who heard Evanescence once and all of my hopes and dreams were laid out in front of me. I started piano lessons that same year and started singing at age 7. I had so many obstacles in my way and people who didn’t believe in me, and each year my confidence plummeted a bit more. Around the age of 10, my mental stability really took a turn for the worst and I was just this sad, angry little kid. That year I started using piano and singing as a coping mechanism. I would play for hours instead of inflicting self harm or to distract my mind. I started to write my own songs then as well, but the first song I always seemed to play when my fingers touched any keyboard was “My Immortal”. I’ve never related to a song more. As a kid I was so tired of being there and I was suppressed by all of my fears. Every word she sang hit home for me.

Now we fast forward about 20 years, and I walk into a bar that changes my whole life. My cousin and I went out for a girls night and there was Leaving Eden up on stage; the first time I ever cried at a concert. The first thing I noticed was that the band was female-fronted, and although a different sound than Evanescence, they were epic! I knew then that I was meant to be up on that stage with them.

They played an original song - it might have been “How I Miss You” - and I had tears falling, goosebumps; I was truly moved.

Then BOOM! I am playing keys for Leaving Eden. BAM! Singing and starting to write songs for Leaving Eden. Drum Roll Please! Now I am seeing Evanescence live for the first time.

I was counting down the days until the concert before the pandemic postponed it. I was so upset for weeks. When the time finally came, I was absolutely blown away.

Having such high expectations, I almost expected them not to be met. No one is that good. But Amy Lee took my expectations and threw them out the window with the first song they played. When the grand piano came out for “My Immortal”, I knew what was coming. There I was, standing in the crowd, watching my life played in front of me through her song. I think I sang the whole dang song with her. It was as if nothing else mattered; I was completely entranced in the moment. It’s crazy how music literally feeds your soul. I needed that. In that moment, it was like my life finally had meaning. I finally made it somewhere and I almost felt like I owed some of that to Evanescence. I was so emotional, I didn’t even notice when I began to cry. With my hands up in the sky, I lived in the moment and sang my heart out.

There were so many moments where I literally saw myself up there. I never realized how similar we were in our performance styles at the keyboards, even the way she moves while singing. It’s like without even knowing it, I conditioned myself my whole childhood with her music and it has made me a better artist now. I could only dream of opening for Evanescence and sharing a stage with Amy Lee, although a long shot I will never give up hope!

-Alyssa White, keyboardist for Leaving Eden

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